Officer: May I see your driver’s licence?
Driver: I don’t have one. I had it suspended when I got caught drink driving.
Officer: May I see the MOT certificate and insurance for this vehicle?
Driver: It’s not my car. I stole it.
Officer: The car is stolen?
Driver: That’s right. But come to think of it, I think I saw the insurance certificate in the glove box when I was putting my gun in there.
Officer: There’s a gun in the glove box?
Driver: Yes sir. That’s where I put it after I shot and killed the woman who owns this car and stuffed her in the boot.
Officer: There’s a BODY in the boot?!?!?
Driver: Yes, sir.
Hearing this, the officer immediately called his sergeant. The car was quickly surrounded by police, and the sergeant approached the driver to handle the tense situation:
Sergeant: Sir, can I see your driving licence?
Driver: Sure. Here it is.
It was valid.
Sergeant: Who’s car is this?
Driver: It’s mine, officer. Here’s the logbook, MOT certificate and insurance.
The driver owned the car.
Sergeant: Could you slowly open your glove box so I can see if there’s a gun in it?
Driver: Yes, sir, but there’s no gun in it.
Sure enough, there was nothing in the glove box.
Sergeant: Would you mind opening the boot? I was told you said there’s a body in it.
Driver: No problem.
Boot is opened; no body.
Sergeant: I don’t understand it. The officer who stopped you said you told him you didn’t have a driving licence, stole the car, had a gun in the glovebox, and that there was a dead body in the boot.
Driver: Yeah, I’ll bet the lying swine told you I was speeding, too…